Good Reason

It's okay to be wrong. It's not okay to stay wrong.

Category: computing (page 6 of 6)

Religious nutter Turing Test

The Turing Test is a classic in AI. On one side of the screen is you, and on the other side there’s either a human typing to you, or a computer generating text to you. A computer system passes the Turing Test if you can’t tell the difference between the computer and a human.

But when the human is a religious ranter, it tends to lower the bar a bit.

So here’s your test. One of the following text blocks is a bit of an email I got today from ‘Günter’, a poor soul trapped in two false beliefs: that supernatural beings exist, and that he can write comprehensible English.

The other block of text was made with a simple Markov chain trained on word trigrams from Günter’s email.

Sample number one:

Every thing, Love is a ground-need, without Love no Feelings are working, no human can find anymore satisfaction no matter what he trays to do it, the highest law of God, and no grace. Not even when somebody used your Authority-shyness like always, it is exactly the same. With Love the Apocalypse is running for ten years. {Glasshouse-effect? Global warming ?}.You can easy scientific prove, it is up to you. Jesus said <I came on earth to bring the Love and only where the Love and how to do Love, try it and you have to feel it. John says <even when you are doing what I say {that only is FAITH} and not only when you know about it>.Jesus said: sacrifice your self <you have to like them in any way, only give what you have<Logo>!

Number two:

That’s why Jesus said the End is near. The human where believing that Love is: cooking a meal; mending socks; squeeze a lemon; give Money, Tender; Fondness or even Sexuality. They filling up whole Libraries with books about Love, only in the explanation of the Old Testament {Torah; Koran; Kamathutra ;} or Jesus was never one interested. Jesus tried to teach Love and how to do it, the highest law of God. Out of the old scriptures he explained; proofing and showed in life what he is talking about. God says in the in the Old Testament; Torah; Koran; Kamathutra; <I m the Love and only the Love and only where the Love is can I be.> don’t make a picture or allegory {don’t compare me with nothing or nobody} of me. Never!!

Well, humans, which is the person, and which is the computer?

How to improve T9

I recently won the contest for ‘Last Person on Earth to Get a Mobile Phone’. First prize was a mobile phone. I like it. It was worth outlasting that guy from the Amazon. He got a toaster, and nowhere to plug it in. Ha.

My phone uses T9, the predictive text algorithm. It was invented in the early 90’s, and don’t you think we would have come up with some improvements in language technology since then? But no, we’re still stuck with it, and every day I text Ms Perfect to tell her that I’ll be ‘good room’ instead of ‘home soon’. ‘Good’ and ‘home’ are textonyms, you probably know, both keyed as 4663. I can change from one to the other by hitting zero, but it irritates of.

Irritates ‘me’, sorry.

I’ve seen very little out there on improving the T9 algorithm, so here are my suggestions.

  • At the very least, correct gibberish words. Even a relevant word like ‘texting’ comes out as ‘textiog’ on my Samsung mobile.
  • Auto completion. When I type a long word like ‘predictive’ or ‘abracadabra’, it should have a way to complete the word for me. If there is one, someone let me know.
  • Long-term memory on training. T9 does try to adapt to your usage. I’ve noticed that if I type the same textonym over and over, changing it to another variant each time, it’ll select the variant automatically on the fourth time. But only for that message. Next message you send, it forgets all your training. What is the point?
  • And this is the big one: Word bigram modelling. Many textonyms could be disambiguated simply by looking at one or two previous words. For example, ‘good’ and ‘home’ are both 4663, but the previous words are very often different. If the previous word is ‘coming’, choose ‘home’. If ‘is’, ‘was’, or an adverb like ‘very’, choose ‘good’. It’s very simple to check this. When I compared ‘home’ and ‘good’ in the Brown Corpus, there were no duplicates in the top 100 lists of words previous. Same with ‘am’ and ‘an’, another pair of textonyms. Which tells me that just looking at the previous word would be enough to disambiguate in the majority of cases. And that means we can stop hitting zero so many times.

Tech thought for the day

It wasn’t always obvious, but there’s no hiding it in 3D: Fido Dido is a frighteningly misshapen and deformed character. Is that supposed to be hair, or head-mounted tentacles?

CGI isn’t always better.

Hillary v Obama: a machine learning task

If you want to organise lots of data in an understandable format (and predict the future besides), you can’t beat decision trees. (Except with Bayesian networks, artificial neural networks, case-based reasoning, or transformation-based learning.) You can throw tons of data at a decision tree algorithm, and it’ll present it as an easy-to-read chart.

Here’s an interesting decision tree about Hillary v Obama in Pennsylvania. The most discriminating features (ones that provide the most information) appear at the top of the tree. The way this one turned out, it appears that Obama wins in counties that are better educated and/or have a higher concentration of black voters.

Professor Layton and the Curious Village

I’m a puzzle nerd from way back, so I got “Professor Layton and the Curious Village” for the DS the day it came out here. I’m enjoying it severely, in part because I can watch the children go through hours of torment. Ha, ha, son. Don’t give up — try the chocolate puzzle again!

And when you get one right, the Professor sometimes says (in a crisp accent), “Critical thinking is the key to success!” You know how I love that kind of talk.

But wouldn’t it be annoying to be in an actual town like that? Perhaps like this ‘Penny Arcade‘ cartoon.

Macs v. PCs, part forty trillion

Ten years ago, when everyone thought Apple would cack it, I was a fierce Apple partisan. I’d been using Macs since they existed (MacPlus with no hard drive, bitches!!!) and I’d try to convince friends, bosses, anyone to go Mac. What if my favourite computer disappeared? and so on.

Now in this age of iPods, Pixar, and Intel chips, Apple’s future is looking assured, and I’ve calmed down a lot. I still wouldn’t use anything but a Mac, but I tell people that most systems are pretty good and they can all do pretty much the same things. Try them all and then use what you like.

Even so, it’s nice to see an occasional article like this one in Popular Mechanics, where they compare Macs and PCs. Not surprising was that the testers like Macs better. Rather surprising was that Macs run Vista faster in emulation than the PCs themselves. Quite surprising was that Macs were a bit cheaper.

Have a read, and then come back and sledge the OS of your choice.

Latest spam technology

New from the Junk box: Watch as spammers use thesaurus-based substitution to turn a normal paragraph into unintelligible gibberish!

You’ll be whizgiggling like never before. Or perhaps srieking.

Chicks always laughed at me and even men did in the not private WC!
Well, now I sriek at them, because I took M eg ad ik
for 3 months and now my putz is quite bigger than national.

Baronesses always whizgiggled at me and even boys did in the unrestricted bathroom!
Well, now I giggl at them, because I took Meg, a dik.
for 4 months and now my phallus is badly more than average.

Virgins always whizgiggled at me and even boys did in the national water closet!
Well, now I whizgiggle at them, because I took Me – ga – Di k
for 5 months and now my cock is greatly greater than world.

I’ll bet.

Why did the robot cross the road?

Getting a computer to recognise humour is a tricky undertaking, but some language researchers are attempting it — if you can call puns ‘humour’.

Understanding a pun is sort of like a word-sense disambiguation task. If you’ll forgive an example:

Sign at a drug rehabilitation center: “Keep off the grass.”

Here, two senses of a word play off each other, to somewhat humourous effect. Word-sense disambiguation is a well-studied area in natural language processing, so this is as good a place as any to start.

Here’s an account of one such attempt.

To teach the program to spot jokes, the researchers first gave it a database of words, extracted from a children’s dictionary to keep things simple, and then supplied examples of how words can be related to one another in different ways to create different meanings. When presented with a new passage, the program uses that knowledge to work out how those new words relate to each other and what they likely mean. When it finds a word that doesn’t seem to fit with its surroundings, it searches a digital pronunciation guide for similar-sounding words. If any of those words fits in better with the rest of the sentence, it flags the passage as a joke. The result is a bot that “gets” jokes that turn on a simple pun.

That sounds simple, but the main problem is how to tell when words don’t seem to fit with the other words in the sentence. For this project, it sounds like they’re generating co-occurrence tables, or statistics about how often any given word is likely to be seen with any other given word. That way, if a word shows up with other words it’s not likely to co-occur with, the system will flag it.

Click on the graphic for an example:

This approach might work well for puns that rely on similar-sounding words, but what about our ‘Keep off the grass’ example above, where the pun relies on two senses of the same word? This system will fail to notice that a pun exists because there’s nothing to suggest that a “Keep off the grass” sign is anything out of the ordinary. And ‘drug’ and ‘grass’ do happen to co-occur in texts, so the system will see no incongruity.

To recognise these kinds of jokes, I might try scanning words in the sentence for multiple senses, and then seeing if groups of words show interesting properties. Perhaps ‘grass-1’ will co-occur frequently with ‘keep’, ‘off’, and ‘sign’, but ‘grass-2’ will co-occur with ‘drug’ and ‘rehabilitation’. We might then infer that since both senses of ‘grass’ are well-linked to different words in the sentence, a pun is going on.

This kind of approach, where we look for unexpected word occurrences, comes close to the essence of humour. Many things are funny because they’re unexpected, yet somehow right. To a small child, slipping on a banana peel is funny because it’s unexpected. Walking down the street unimpeded is normal, and therefore not funny. As humans, we have a lot of experience with the world, and we know what’s likely to happen and what’s not. Giving this informaton to computers is a difficult task, but it may be the key to humour recognition.

Vista

I’ve been a hardcore Mac guy since 1984, when my dad got an early 512. No hard drive, but two floppies. In my days of moral certainty, I was a fire-breathing Mac evangelist, but I haven’t felt really partisan about the OS Wars for years. Apple is thriving, Macs run on Intel chips now, and you can run Windows programs on your Mac. There’s certainly no reason to get excited about the whole Mac/Windows issue. It’s so 1997. Use what makes you feel happy.

And yet, I never really got over the injustice of Microsoft achieving world dominance by ripping off the best of the MacOS. And so I feel irkage when I hear reports of Microsoft artlessly plundering the Mac yet again for their new Vista system.

Luckily, David Pogue (formerly of the Pogues), points out that it’s not a ripoff at all. I feel better.

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