Good Reason

It's okay to be wrong. It's not okay to stay wrong.

The Provo Tabernacle died for your sins

The Provo Tabernacle burned down. It’s a real shame. I went to church there a couple of times in my Utah days, and I remember it as a good old building. It would have made a nice library in 100 years.

One might wonder, of course, why the Mormon god would allow a church building to be destroyed by fire as he watches, pitiless and indifferent to human affairs. One might even wonder what message he intends to send. Perhaps an Old-Testament-style message of anger and vengeance! The fire and destruction symbolic of the wrath to come. A Mormon might get a sense of divine disapproval, and that would never do.

But wait! It’s a Christmas miracle!

As the four-alarm fire raged at the Provo Tabernacle, firefighters and those watching helplessly from the sidewalk observed something truly remarkable. Some are even calling it “a Christmas miracle.”

A painting of Jesus Christ burned in the fire, save for the image of the son of God [yes, that was the wording chosen by Fox News], which was left unscathed.

Yep, the church burning down isn’t the real takeaway here. It’s the painting. That’s the ticket.

This is the Argument from Incomplete Devastation, one of many ways to creatively interpret events in order to sustain a narrative that you already believe. Religious folk are quick to use this one because in the face of disaster, there are only two possible outcomes — either your faith is boosted, or your faith is boosted more. You have to admire their optimism, at least.

Here’s the scorched painting. Coming soon to a fireside near you.

Wait a minute! Forget about Jesus — that outline around it looks strangely familiar! Could it be the hunched figure of…

Nah.

11 Comments

  1. I don't know anyone who would actually listen or place merit on anything you have to say considering your a crazy person. " President-in-exile of the world," wow.

  2. Too funny. Yes, they can always spin the bad news to look good.

  3. Yes we Christians are always looking on the bright side even when all is wrong.

    And you always looking at whats wrong even when when all is right.

    Oh,i almost forgot Merry Christmas

  4. Why do believers torture themselves by reading the comedic musings of non-believers?!

    The aura around Jesus in the painting reminded me of a certain golden statue found atop every Mormon temple. Surely that makes the miracle even more solid, being a Mormon building and all.

  5. Why do believers torture themselves by reading the comedic musings of non-believers?!

    I agree, but truth be told, I wonder the same thing about myself. Let's just say I've always enjoyed absurdism.

  6. Mmmm, yes.. I guess I torture myself too then. To me it seems to be a matter of forcing myself to face the information and the debates in order to hopefully decompress more successfully. I saw Toby crumble when his grandfather died and thought to myself that he really had to face a lot at such an emotional time, I did wonder whether he would have had an 'easier' time with the grief etc if he had confronted some of the demons beforehand??

    It still surprises me though that believers even engage with us… and then it surprises me even more that as Christians (or whatever gods they reverence) they seem to sound the meanest in the conversations. Or is that just me being subjective? (and sensitive!).

  7. Obviously God burned the church down to punish the Mormons for straying from the path in their abandonment of polygyny. The part of the painting with Jesus in it was saved to show them that Jesus supports polygyny.

  8. I would believe that a mormon temple would have more than just 1 image of Christ in their halls. If this was a "miracle," than what about all the other pictures?

    Saying that a random painting of Christ is a miracle is as absurd as saying that getting a white christmas in Georgia was a miracle (but the snow was awesome)

  9. Obviously, Jesus burned down the tabernacle because Mormons are a bunch of heretics, and he left the picture of himself so they'd know who did it.

  10. More Mormon buildings need to be set on fire to see if the phenomenon is replicable.

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